WURMKLOSS FOREVER

WURMKLOSS FOREVER

Bröckedde is located in the heart of Germany - where the Rhine and Danube flow into the beautiful Bröckeddesee. This is where RC Bröckedde meets in the Bröckedder Hof - every Wednesday at 1 pm in the Salon Hindenburg.

Alexander Hoffmann                                                                                                    01.02.2022

RC Bröckedde’s Homepage was central to club life. At a recent meeting President Pröpke had referred to it as “our shop window”, to which Friend Dr Krümelein responded rather tartly, “Yes, but a shop window displaying rather outdated goods”.

In fact, the Club’s Homepage really wasn’t anything like up to date. The latest photo was taken at a function in 2018, with members enjoying themselves all crowed together, long before anyone had heard the term “social distancing” and when masks were for balls not de rigueur. “The good old days” sighed Pröpke, “but our Webmaster Friend Wurmkloß is a rule unto himself.”

A retired headteacher, Friend Wurmkloß had edited the Homepage since it started and under the maxim of “Teutonic thoroughness before unseemly haste”. His notes were always avidly read but took quite some time to appear, were often meagre with a tendency of being rather cutting as well. A photo of a donation being made was headed “The usual suspects” and a group photo of the Club carried a note that the gentleman second from the left was no longer a Rotarian but was not much of a loss to the Club. Reports on the Club’s talks and presentations were seldom more than a couple words; “took place”, for example.

Pröpke and Dr Krümelein set about persuading Friend Wurmkloß to relinquish his position as Webmaster. It was time for a generation change and young Friend Wasserlos was eminently qualified to takeover. Unfortunately, Friend Wurmkloß was deeply hurt and mobilised the old guard to come to his aid, claiming the Homepage reflected the Club’s character. Pröpke feared an impending ****storm with the message “We want Wurmloß” going viral, albeit in a very minor way.

A cunning plan was required to square this particular circle. Friend Wasserlos would design a new 5G website with all sorts of new gimmicks and links. In the meantime, Friend Wurmkloß agreed to submit rather more fulsome reports and certainly began doing so. The trouble was that cliché of an old dog and new tricks; Wurmkloß just couldn’t resist a put down. He noted that a presentation on “Bröckedde’s architecture as a pioneer of postmodernism” had probably been lifted straight out a recent copy of the “Die Zeit” weekly newspaper. Another talk on Shakespeare’s Henry IV received a caustic quotation from the same play “As a candle, the better burnt out”.

Whilst President Pröpke remained a great fan of the quiet life, even he felt enough was enough. At the next opportunity, he asked Friend Wasserlos for an update on the new website and whether there was a way of protecting the edit function against anyone with a date of birth before 1980.