Speaker Meeting, 6.15 for 6.30pm

Rotarian Lynn Withey is a former Funeral Director and was the Club’s President in 2013/14.  Taking the speaker’s role at this meeting she called her talk “It shouldn’t happen to a Funeral Director”.

“Certain qualities” she said, “are needed to be a Funeral Director, particularly patience and empathy”.  Another essential is the ability to be a good organiser since for any funeral there are so many logistics to arrange and get right.  Such as dealing with the bereaved families, speaking to the minister and arranging the vehicles.  She shared several stories with us to illustrate that a sense of humour is also a very important and essential quality.

Ministers were sometimes a challenge - some didn’t like doing funerals so they sent their curates; others would only do them on certain days of the week.  On two occasions the minister didn’t even turn up!!   And a certain Roman Catholic cleric liked to ensure that Lynn was well and truly drenched with Holy Water whenever he was officiating.  And then, after one particular funeral, Lynn received a telephone call from the minister complaining that instead of the requested “Silent Night” playing as the people left the crematorium, “Jingle Bells” was ringing out in its place!!!!! 

Vehicles of all types are used to bring the coffin.  Once it was a tractor – which of course travelled at tractor pace!!   Horse drawn carriages are very popular but come with a risk to a Funeral Director as only the “driver” has a seat belt.  Consequently emergency stops can be dangerous!!!  Lynn once arranged for a Fire Engine to lead the procession for a fire-fighter’s funeral.

On one occasion Lynn had a visit from a lady who said she had four bodies and didn’t know what to do with them.  It transpired that the bodies were actually skeletons owned by the Highworth Historical Society.  After informing the Coroner’s Office confirmation was received that as the skeletons were extremely old the Coroner had no interest in them and a funeral service could go ahead.  That funeral had coverage from the BBC!!!

Lynn has arranged funerals for all faiths and no-faiths – Military, Chinese, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Pagan – being just some examples.

She concluded her amusing talk by saying just how privileged she was to have been a Funeral Director.